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[cameclosest]

[Varker is attempting to speak clearly, but there is a definite lisp as he trips over his own teeth.]

You've reached Dr. Varker. As a note, yes I do accept bribes in exchange for good behavior.

Comments

Audio

[weirdnecro]

Hello, Varker is it? May I speak with you?

Re: Audio

[cameclosest]

You may. I cant promise I'll stay on the line long depending on what you'd like to talk to me about though.

Re: Audio

[weirdnecro]

That's more than fair.

I would like to request that I apologize to you in person. Would you be open to that?

Re: Audio

[cameclosest]

I prefer it, actually.

Where ever you deem appropriate. My cabin is available if you arent allergic to cats.

back dated to not long after the 30th

[packhounds]

Hello, Dr. Varker? Do you have a moment to talk?

Re: back dated to not long after the 30th

[cameclosest]

[If he sounds just a little drunk, don't pay any attention to it, he most definitely is.]

Perhaps. Though usually a person introduces themselves before requesting someone's time.

Re: back dated to not long after the 30th

[packhounds]

Cultural differences! [Cheerfully.] Shuos Mikodez.

Re: back dated to not long after the 30th

[cameclosest]

[obviously Mikodez is just backwater and has no concept of manners.]

What can I do for you?

[Video] -- a few days after the end of the space station port event

[love_and_peace]

[ The feed opens on Vash's worried, smiling face, as he waves to the camera. Hi, remember him? ]

Hello, Dr Varker! It's Vash. We met on that station? I, uh... I opened the door to C Wing and let a couple of crazy people out who I understand killed you?

[ Oops? ]

I'm really really sorry about that!

Re: [Video] CW: suicide

[cameclosest]

Oh, they weren't all that crazy. They watched my face change as if I was one of the aliens who had been trying to kill them and decided to shoot first, ask questions later.

[He smiles, but perhaps for the wrong reason as he continues. If Vash wants to be an idiot, he needs to learn that it hurts sometimes.]

Actually, I should be thanking you. I tried to kill myself before and no one wanted to let me. Walking towards a scared man with a gun, we both got what we wanted. He shot an 'alien' and I got a moment of death.

You'll have to let Folgate know, I'm sure he'll want to thank the man who let him off the hook for a few hours. He had to kill me himself, you know? So I didn't suffer. Apparently it was merciful enough that he didn't even get demoted by the Admiral.

He was quite worried about it.

[love_and_peace]

[ Since this call is video, Varker gets to watch Vash go through his own version of the five stages of grief in realtime as he talks. First there's pity, then horror, then there's tears, and a barely controlled kind of panic, and finally a frantic head-nodding. ]

I will. I'll tell him, it was my fault.

[ Suicide. Varker committed suicide, god! How unhappy is he, to take such an extreme measure?! ]

How can I make it up to you?

[cameclosest]

Fault? No. You just opened the door.

That's harmless, isn't it? Such an easy thing to do, and all those good intentions...[He knows what that looks like. He'd experienced it when Simon dragged him down to his basement lab. Hes skipped the bargaining step though, which is probably for the best.

Then he might actually feel guilty, and he's enjoying that look of misery. It so enjoys company, doesn’t it?]

I don't need anything now, but that doesn't mean I won't always.

A favor in the future will do, I think. Does that seem fair to you? And perhaps leave this part out when you talk to Folgate. He might want one too and he can get so greedy.

[love_and_peace]

[ He hadn't realized he'd kept it, but after a load of laundry Vash discovers the handkerchief in the pocket of his pants. It's tempting to just drop it on the floor of the laundry room and let somebody else find it! It's tempting to drop it in the trash.

But if either of those got back to Varker he'd never hear the end of it.

And so he ignores the voice in the back of his head telling him that this is a terrible idea and heads straight to Varker's cabin, knocking before he can stop himself. He'll just hand the handkerchief back and leave, he tells himself. Quick and easy, and then it'll be done. ]

[cameclosest]

[Varker is still in his cabin, though circumstances later in the hallway to do with a certain witch dying and leaving her nasty magic all over the floor will find him making the decision to move in with Norton after humming and hawing over the suggestion.

He opens the heavy office door and for a moment looks surprised, Audrey giving a few clicks, but before he can say anything, Lullabee starts rubbing herself against Vash's leg and meowing in greeting.

Varker would say she's a traitor but she is a queen who adores strangers and attention. So instead he pivots, looking expectantly at Vash.]

If you don't tell my cat how pretty she is I'm slamming the door in your face.

[love_and_peace]

[ The door opens, which is a surprise... and then Varker doesn't immediately start cursing him out, which is also a nice surprise!

Even the cat doesn't attack, which is a shock more than anything. Cats don't usually like him, and so he's not really sure what to do when there's one rubbing against his leg other than standing perfectly still for fear of kicking it. ]

Ah. She's very pretty? You're very pretty, [ he directs down to the cat in question, before looking back up to Varker and holding out the handkerchief. ]

I'm just here for this.

[cameclosest]

[Varker raises his eyebrow, watching Vash stiffen up like an absolute weirdo.

He bends over an picks up Lullabee easily in one arm, scratching under her chin.]

What is wrong with you? Haven't you ever greeted a cat before? She isnt going to bite, she's a lady.

Pet her for god sake, or you might make her think you don't like her.

[He will look at that handkerchief though, glsncing back up at Vash.]

Took you long enough. You did wash it I hope?

[weirdnecro]

Varker?

I have a bit of a weird request, if I may.

[cameclosest]

Regardless how weird it is, I'm not going to say yay or nay until you tell me.

Go ahead?

[weirdnecro]

Figured because you're not a bleeding heart.

Would you come to the memorial room with me?

I don't want to go into the chapel, and I'd like someone to yank me out that isn't going to get all...

Sappy at me.

text;

[giraffic]

sorry about going full horror movie on you

Re: text;

[cameclosest]

[Varker doesnt think this is something she has to apologize for, it wasnt her. He felt the same way when he was told to 'apologize better' when he was triggered months ago by a fucking dog whistle.

It hadn't been him, the apology anyone got was more than he owed anyone.]

Not your fault.

The flood was apparently unpleasant for most of us. Im not even sure your infection COULD spread to me anyways, and honestly I've been chased by worse.

[Hard to say whether a teenage friend losing her autonomy to be a monster is any worse than of his coworkers and friends consumed by a madwoman to be grasping hands and screaming faces in her living, fucked up hair but he isnt going to tell her that.]

Re: text;

[giraffic]

guess if i gave you nightmares, at least there's a brain doctor

New Year's Walk of Shame

[pharadyne]

[Norton shuffles into his cabin in the morning looking as if he had either the best or worst time at the party. He's carrying the modestly-heeled shoes and one strap of his dress is sliding off his shoulder. His hair is a wild mess and his lipstick smeared and mascara smudged all over his cheeks. His silk stockings have a terrible run in them.

He drops the shoes on the floor as soon as he closes the door and drops himself onto the settee as soon as he gets to the sitting room area.]

Re: New Year's Walk of Shame

[cameclosest]

[Varker had snuck out of Oscar's early that morning. He had woken up around 4 am and remembered that the priest had gotten sober, not a fucking drop to be had in his cabin.

He'd left the refilling glass in the enclosure, and when he'd gotten back to Folgates, he'd pulled a bottle off the shelf, not caring which one and dragged it and his carcass over to the settee, staring at the ceiling and day dreaming of drinking himself to death.

When Norton comes back in, he says nothing, though one eye cracks open, spotting the hot mess meander his way. He doesn't move, he was here first, but that doesn't deter Norton who plops his fat ass down right on Varker's abdomen.

He responds by dramatically acting as if the wind was knocked out of him and complaining loudly, not caring if Folgate was hung over or not.]

Do you fucking mind? I was here first, and I'm not moving.

You can sit your fat ass down somewhere else, Jesus christ. Dont even know why I put up with you.

[pharadyne]

[There were no lights on in the room, and the windows show only the darkness of space outside, lit by stars, so between that and his own lack of attention he hadn't noticed Varker was on the settee until he was sitting on him.

He squeaks in surprise at Varker's loud complaint and jumps up with such a violent start that he stumbles and falls to his hands and knees on the floor. He stays there a few seconds processing what just happened and takes a few breaths.]

't's my bloody settee...

[He mutters, but climbs into the nearby chair instead and slumps there. He squints at Varker.]

Are you still drunk?